Love waits on welcome, not on time, I found. With my brand new way of life, I have moved into a love based life instead of fear based one. This has created a spiritual awakening. My lack of a conscious contact with a higher power was missing even though I attended church for years.
I found many things that were not supportive of the life that I wanted. A few of these I have shared throughout my articles. Socrates said, “The unexamined life is not worth living.”
Through following the advice of “trust God, clean house, and help others“, I began examining my life. My columns for the last year have been part of my taking personal inventory. I have been scrutinizing my life for several years. A major one was that was that it was difficult for me to trust anyone, as my parents were not trustworthy. My marriage was domestic violence with rape; it was not trustworthy, either. How do you trust something invisible?
I discovered myself in perilous difficulties of life or death numerous times. I have almost died 12 times. It was obvious there was something there for me and it was keeping me alive. This became a faith that is strong today.
Recently, I fell down on asphalt in a parking lot from a hole that needs to be fixed. I got a black eye and my right arm, shoulder, and wrist were very painful. I fortunately had help to get up. Because I have arthritis in my knees, I would not have been able to get myself up. I luckily did not have any broken bones; however, I did break my glasses. The concussion put me out of business of helping my clients, writing, and artwork for several weeks.
Now, I am able to see the bigger picture of why it happened instead of blaming the church for poor maintenance. I found that some old energy still had to leave as I was in the old mindset fearing being hit in the face since early childhood when I witnessed my mother being beaten. I had also been fearful of a black eye in my marriage, which would have not been good, when I went to teach at school. My black eye is less purple each day.
I also, found out reasons for having the concussion. One was to put space between my old life and new one. I was now able to stop being a workaholic and overachiever. My projects had to stop. I hope to resume soon with a realistic pace. I am treating it like a vacation from work, which I needed.
I am still recuperating by resting, using ice on the painful parts, and allowing the healing to happen. I took the steps to get my glass frames replaced. I never thought about suing anyone. I responded appropriately. I was not happy, but I could accept this had to happen for my spiritual growth.
My early fearful energies needed to depart. This previous energy was being pushed out along with releasing other old negative energies. It was all part of my energy moving out as it is not who I am anymore. It was a necessary experience. It was needed for the new energy of love to have the space. Moving up the ladder of consciousness is my goal.
Life is about moving from being selfish to selfless. In a film, a few years back “Ground Hog Day” was a popular show. It has become one of the acknowledged classics of American comedy. “Groundhog Day” concerns TV weatherman Phil Connors, who is forced to live the same Feb. 2 repeatedly until he gains some karmic—and comic—insight into his life. By the end of the movie, he has become less egotistical and more laudable. He has matured.
My task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within myself that I built against it. With over thirty years of cleaning and releasing, my fear based negative thoughts, communication, and behaviors from my ego, I have found a new me.
I do not think as a victim anymore. I have a sense of being worthy and assertive. I recognized that my childish eyes saw things differently from what they really were; realizing that my life is not what I thought, brought a new pair of glasses. With forgiveness, compassion, gratitude, and feeling the presence of goodness within, I moved into a higher consciousness.
This allows me to help others from an elevated loving resolution for situations and old harms. My inspiration and training as a spiritual teacher, regressionist, teacher, writer, counselor, and a medium are a few of my many hats. They allow me to guide clients and readers into positive solutions for moving forward in their lives. I am able to see beyond the observable into the root cause of situations allowing loving resolutions. This ability resolves issues.
Today helping others is a big part of my life. The more I give, the more I have. My awareness of how smoothly my life is really going these days is amazing. Assisting others spreads a path before me that is calm and even.
To me the ultimate example of living a spiritual life is the activities of Mother Teresa. Mother Teresa was the founder of the Order of the Missionaries of Charity, a Roman Catholic congregation of women dedicated to helping the poor. Considered one of the greatest humanitarians of the 20th century, she was canonized as Saint Teresa of Calcutta in 2016.
It is necessary to seek for what is false and release it. I can leave fear, heartache, and self-imposed boundaries behind. Instead, I am able to live a life full of purpose and joy. With my ego diminished, I can heal and be happy —I can reside in peace. With a sense of self-esteem and my needs met, I become a channel of help—I am an agent of love. I am able to be in reality, harmony, and in service.
“ROAD TO SUCCSS” is my newest book. It has the ability to bring a richer, successful life. Buy it on Amazon.com or my website: Angelicasgifts.com
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