My life was terrible, horrible, and awful growing up. I was sure it would be that way throughout my whole life. It seemed like my life was stuck in cement and would never get better. Even in my older years, it felt like I was doomed to a life of misery. I was always tired, worn out, and busy. It seemed forever. Nothing passed in my life into better times.
When I first heard this saying, I thought it was a joke. This was not possible so I discounted the message. It has taken years to clean out the past emotional baggage so my feelings do pass and the new good feelings can replace the old ones.
When I began to address my old fearful past to release it, it took about 6 months, before I felt a difference for the first time. I woke up one spring morning to the sun shining and the birds outside were singing. It felt good that morning. What a treat when you never felt good in the morning before going to work or any place. I realized that my old feelings had passed and the good ones had come in. I decided to enjoy the good weather and walk to work. It was a mile walk, but it was such a nice morning, I wanted to take pleasure in it.
This gave me the understanding that the old negativity in my life can leave and I can have a new experience that is high quality. Therefore, I continued to clean out my inner house of remaining old disturbing baggage. I found that if I ask to remove it in prayer that is an altered state of mind, then I can replace it with love and grace. Gradually, my days had good moments. Some days were better as time progressed. I felt better about my life and myself.
I had no idea what grace really was at the time, but I knew it was better than what I had in the past. While camping at Death Valley National Park, I was meditating. What a wonderful site because the energy is so old. Without any warning, I felt grace from head to toe for the first time. It was wonderful.
How do you explain something invisible? It seemed like white billowy clouds inside that were soft, comfy without any harshness. I was emotionally surrounded in this yielding, cozy and relaxing space. Wow! This was new to me. Then, continuing to remove any old harshness and negativity was not a concern. I knew how good it could feel to be in unconditional love.
This experience expanded with more meditation. I found this space of grace when I meditate daily. This feeling began to grow into more and more of my experience. Meditation felt so good with the feelings of grace, I did not want to miss my morning or evening meditations. Later, I often stop in the afternoon, calling it my meditation break instead of taking a coffee break. I like this stress free place experience. When I return to work I am refreshed to move forward.
I return to this space more easily and quickly lately. I like having my life in a pressure free zone. My life is now in more grace than the nervousness of the past. I understand that when I am in grace today I have moved into a higher consciousness out of the past third dimension of prior fears and harms.
This is my goal in life to move back into the presence of God. This is a higher quality of life, where there is only unconditional love. I am moving up into a new reality of unconditional love, which is the grace of God.
When I was sick as a child, I was put in a room and told I could come out when I was well. I had no idea of how to help a person when they needed help from medical conditions. In the past, if someone was sick, I went the other way, as I was clueless of what to do. When my boyfriend recently had a stroke and then eye surgery, I could step up to the plate each time and be of assistance easily with a sense of what he needed. I had matured from that sick, scared little three year old.
This simply means I have ascended beyond the ego’s fear running my life where I react irrationally and I am in an insane state of mind. In third dimension my ego is the motivation for survival. In grace, I am immersed in the unconditional love of God without any interferences to stop grace from providing for my needs. Seek ye first the kingdom of God and all things will be added. The spirit can manifest my needs and provide for me when there is no barriers for this to happen.
This is how the fish multiplied in the Bible. Grace supplied the needed food for the crowd. A person living in grace, will find their needs are taken care of. I am finally able to get a new furnace for my hot tub. For years, I have had to turn on the power each time to use it and that takes more power. It is also inconvenient to wait for the water to heat.
As my pool has stopped heating, I needed a service person to fix this. While he was here doing that, I found out he fixed the leak, too. I had been adding water for several years, not knowing where to find the leak. Then in our conversation, he knew about the kind of heater I wanted. None of my other service people said it was possible to have a heater like I described. My friend has one like this, but every time I tried to find a person to install one, I was told it was not possible with my hot tub. Surprisingly, the date is set to get the new pool heater. It came together, easily when I called to get the pool heating again.
When I think back of how my life was 32 years ago, in the crisis, chaos, and turmoil of fear, I know that the past has moved out of my life. Life is no longer fearful or destructive. No longer do I play the victim and need a person to save or take care of me. I have a relationship of unconditional love with the freedom to be myself, today. I handle life intuitively and find instinctively how to handle new situations. The past is no longer the basis of my motivation to react. I now respond in loving resolutions. Love never fails.